Wednesday, October 28, 2009

why i need yoga

i've heard its been a rough week. i, myself, can say that it's been rough. between really stinky egos, the santa anas and some topsy turvy timing, wednesday can feel like hell. they call it humpday for a reason. for us weekend warriors, it symbolizes the climax of the week, where you're supposed to both deliver and plan. it's when you've reached a certain height to your efforts and your thoughts are starting to include what you want to do when you rest or play. this feeling can be isolating and uncomfortable.

wednesday night yoga with joseph van arsdale is my medicine. it helps me let go of the anger, hurt or sadness that can permeate my spirit. i helps me work out all of those bad feelings and thoughts as i focus on how my body feels, how it moves, where it aches or where it is tense. as i hold my iyengar poses, i pinpoint my weaknesses and work to strengthen them. i feel where i am clutching or gripping and imagine the area lengthening and receiving its much needed oxygen as i breathe.


sometimes i dont have the energy to go, because i know that i'll be putting in more work, but yoga has never let me down. ever. i have always felt better afterward. so i go. sometimes i curse my teacher out because it can hurt; sometimes he makes me laugh and i feel like slacking. but no matter what, i end up putting in the work anyway, stretching, breathing and twisting. i imagine the length of my spine as i forget everything else. i stay in the moment because there's a lot to think about when you're trying to gain control of your body! the meditation that comes from holding still can be so rewarding.

yoga, too, gives me a sense of accomplishment. but this time, it's not so much of a conquering feeling, but a surrendering. during savanasa all you do is lay there, like a corpse (which is what the word means). laying still after challenging movement your body, mind and spirit have a chance to reconcile with each other. it's where you're not quite asleep, yet not quite awake - its state of transcendental bliss. this is why yogis practice. because this bliss feels right. it feels like everything is where its supposed to be, like you are where you're supposed to be - not thinking about what happened a couple hours ago or where you need to be. its comforting to know that you can be still, just for these few moments, and the greater world surrounding you continues as it does, and you're still part of it.

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